For friends and family who know me well know I am not afraid to try new styles with my hair. From the moment my mother gave me the power to take care of my own hair at the age of 12, I experimented with cutting, highlighting, braiding, relaxing, dyeing, weaving, and wigging. I am daring and free-spirited, not afraid to take risk with my hair. At least that is what I liked to believe.
It was deeper than that for me; as I am growing and gaining wisdom of who I am as a black women, over time, I realized I was so brainwashed by society on what is considered beautiful and constantly tried to achieve the standard. It was a case of low self –esteem, not feeling beautiful enough.
I remember the night… I just washed my hair and was sitting on the floor blow-drying my grown-out relaxed hair struggling with split ends and straggly strands. “ I am tired of dealing with this hair! I am going to cut it!” My roommate/ best friend was probably looking at me crazy like, “This girl knows she just talking.” I wasn’t my first time mentioning to my friends that wanted to cut my hair. It would be just like all the other experiments I did to achieve beauty. Also at the time, I thought short hair equaled low-maintenance. Somebody should have pointed me to the light, because I was clueless on the challenges I would face ahead!
I made the decision the next morning I was going to the salon and getting a pixie cut. I must say I was not excited with the cut but over time it grew on me and I loved it! My hair was healthy and thick and I felt a sense of relief from many years of conforming to society’s expectation of beauty for women. I had short hair and I loved it!
I wore my pixie cut for almost a month and welcomed by a bed of new growth; the pixie cut was no more fun. I had two different textures of hair and it became a challenge to maintain and flat iron the pixie. I wasn’t expecting such rapid growth!
At that moment I thought I was ready. I came this far with cutting hair, why not just do it. The moment many naturals had to face… the BC… the Big Chop. Washed my pixie cut and the moment the water hit my scalp, the new growth shriveled up and the remaining relaxed hair dangled lifeless.
*Takes deep breath*
My roomie/best friend began to snip away at 24 years of fear, fear of the judgment of my peers and family I mentally created. 24 years of denial of who I am and what The Good Lord created me to be. 24 years of triumphs and trials, and now I faced making one of the greatest transitions of my life.
I officially joined the Natural Hair Sisterhood and began my own natural hair journey…
I can not say this journey so far has not had ups and downs, and moments that I wanted to run back to the creamy crack but I am choosing everyday to make step forward in a new direction in life- mentally, physically, and spiritually.
I welcome you to join my journey.
Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind
Serve others in Love
Take a Leap in Faith
Travel and Live Unapologetic
Laugh… It’s good for the soul
Don’t be a afraid to fail
Passion has healing powers
Humility comes with wisdom
Slow and steady wins the race… Patience